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Rippy Cocknocker
Archetype: Human Mercenary
Rippy dresses and looks like George Patton and is always
chewing on a big cigar. He speaks in a commanding voice, occasionally to
"Simpy", his imaginary parrot. He wears a pearl handled revolver
on his belt. [Yes, I know Patton didn't actually carry a pearl handled revolver.
Chill.]
Rippy is actually a pretty good leader. Although his orders
seem irrational and idiotic, his track record of never losing a team member
in combat shows that something is going right. He very often goes into
combat himself and occasionally finds good use for the old fashion charge.
Faloop
Archetype: Troll Mercenary
Faloop is Rippy's second in command. He also dresses in
authentic WW2 attire, most of which was not designed for someone his size
and thus fits rather tightly. He carries a very expensive sword on his
belt which he uses only to cut up fruit.
When Faloop relays Rippy's orders they sometimes get jumbled,
sometimes for the better. He also fills in whatever blanks Rippy might
have left. Faloop moves very slowly because he is perpetually in a slow
march. He usually remains behind the front, specializing in the mortar
and other heavy weapons.
Different Pokes
Archetype: Human Mercenary
Pokes likes bayonets and has them
hanging all over his uniform. He loves to talk about their history and, if you
let him, will sit for hours explaining the history of just one. The problem is,
that's all he can talk about. It can get annoying after a while.
Different Pokes knows how to use
virtually every type of light and heavy weapon, though none of them extremely
well. He has rocket launchers, mortars, machine guns....tons of stuff, all of
which have bayonets on them.
Thumpity-Thump-Tha-Thump
Archetype: Ork Mercenary
Four-T, as he is nicnamed, loves grenades
in the same way Pokes loves bayonets. Unfortunately he also loves to hang them
from his uniform and armor. About fifty of them. Four-T is the only member of
the group who has his own car.
Grenades don't really stick around that
long so none really has to worry about their history. But they do have to worry
about Four-T's grotesque grenade stories, only a few of which are true. He has
been known to make even the most seasoned mercenary vomit from the vivid
descriptions.
Stoop Butt
Archetype: Human Mercenary
Stoop Butt has that strange tortoise
disorder which makes him move and talk incredibly slowly. God only knows why
they made him a rigger.
The Mad Men are notorious for being late
for a battle. You'll never see them hired as reinforcements. Sometimes there
doesn't even need to be a battle because the target gets so bored waiting for
the fight they just leave. The final entrances have, at times, generated so much
humor that the two sides just decide not to fight. It usually involves Stoop
Butt's vehicle plowing onto the battlefield and the members stumbling out with
their hands in the air yelling "Sorry we're late. Give us a sec' to get our
stuff."
Company Wiener
Archetype: Human Mercenary
Dresses in a suit even for combat. He looks and acts like
a corporate official. He believes the mercenary unit is a corporation and
that Rippy is his C.E.O. He is always concerned with finances and will
throw in an out of the blue piece of accountant terminology at every possible
opportunity.
Company Wiener was subject to an extraction by the Mad
Men and during transit the group accidentally messed him up so badly that
their employers no longer wanted him. The shock from the incident has launched
him into a permanent psychosis. He is terrible with weapons and will try
to charge into combat with a Tiffini if you let him. Usually he just hangs
back and works on the groups finances, which are probably the most organized
of all mercenary groups.
Miss. Fragem'all
Archetype: Human Mercenary
Tall and spindly, she has black hair
down to her ankles which is perpetually tangled up in something. She dresses
like a combat biker and never goes out into public because she never allows her
grenade launcher to leave her side. She is extremely paranoid and will whip out
her weapon if a cricket so much as chirps wrong.
Miss Fragem'all doesn't really care what she shoots at
while in a heated combat situation. Someone is usually assigned to keep
her pointed in the right direction so she doesn't end up blowing up their
transportation. She and Four-T hang out a lot trading grenades and swapping
grotesque stories.
Aieeeeeee!
Archetype: Dwarf Mercenary
Almost perfectly round, he looks like
Santa Clause's head attached to a beach ball with arms and legs.
Aieeeeeee! is one of the last true mercenary paratroopers.
He has rejected virtually all forms of modern technology and uses the same
chute his great-great grandfather used in World War Two. He carries a broken
down M14 and an ancient grenade launcher. He also carries a tommy gun as
backup.
Weeintheclowds
Archetype: Human Rigger
A really small guy, about four foot
eight and eighty pounds. He resembles a cartoon character in the way he walks
and talks and speaks with a munchkin voice.
Weeintheclouds can do amazing things with his aircraft,
some of them resulting in an amazing crash. He wears a parachute at all
times (even while on the ground) and so does everyone who rides with him
if they're smart. His favorite weapon is a special twenty four shot rocket
launcher and he has designed a maneuver called the "around the word
party" which involves spinning the copter so fast that it fires a
complete 360 degree arc of rockets.
Lookenpeeper
Archetype: Human Rigger
Big round glasses which magnify the size of his eyes two
times. He has datajacks lining his forehead and laughs to himself for no
apparent reason a lot.
Lookenpeeper's Ares Master is a dump. He controls the vehicle
from a unit in the back of the truck and has the vehicle loaded down with
sensors. He also watches too much trid. The stupidest trid. The world's
stupidest trid. He thinks it's funny, though, and sometimes starts laughing
so hard while driving that the vehicle will jerk all over the road until
he controls himself. He also possesses a large number of drones.
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